I often wonder why female leaders frequently tell me about their fears regarding their leadership roles and claim that their male colleagues are more self-assured. And then I ask myself: Is that even true?
But since I hate generalizations, I’m convinced that this is NOT the case and that it’s simply a matter of different styles of presentation and self-perception. That’s why—in coaching sessions and workshops—I have conversations with leaders when I notice a significant lack of SELF-CONFIDENCE and doubts about their SELF-WORTH.
For example, a study in the Harvard Business Review showed that women tend to set higher expectations or standards for themselves than men do. This can lead them to be quicker to criticize themselves and to have little confidence in their own abilities. Fears play a major role in this. It seems that women are more afraid of making mistakes, experiencing setbacks, and facing rejection. As a result, they hold back and have less confidence in their abilities than they actually could.
I am all too familiar with these kinds of thoughts and know that such differences are not innate but are often the result of societal and family expectations or stereotypes that have influenced men and women for generations.
➡️ After all, isn’t it true that many women are often taught from childhood to hold back and be modest? Whereas men, on the other hand, are encouraged to be brave and strong? These are often ingrained, habitual behaviors that are unconscious and later affect self-confidence and self-worth in professional and personal relationships.
I work on this with my clients, and I believe it’s time for all of us to cast aside our stereotypes and such precise, high expectations, and to encourage others (regardless of gender) to realize their FULL POTENTIAL, to question their beliefs, or to actively change them.
That’s why I’m convinced that, even in transformation processes, it’s crucial to examine the leadership STYLE within the company and ensure that leaders are empowered in their personal development. And their doubts and concerns must be addressed to avoid fears of making mistakes or being judged right from the start of their tenure.
➡️ We urgently need leaders who know their self-worth, who dare to express their opinions, who know and can assess their own competencies, who set boundaries, and who live according to their values—so that a strong sense of togetherness can flourish within companies (and families)!
What do you think? Have you had similar experiences?
Bianca-Maria